just checking in

I realize I have not been posting much in this blog recently, but I’m not sure why.  It’s not that I don’t have anything to say, but I guess I have this life-long habit of keeping most of my thoughts to myself. Blogging certainly doesn’t come naturally to me.

I think the main reason is that I have so much on my mind and so many things to do that I have sacrificed time spent on myself; this blog, although public, serves as “me” time.  From a positive aspect, I am busy enough that I’m not over-thinking stuff and do not require a lot of “me” time, so that is good.  On the other hand, if later in life I look back on this time, I may wonder what the heck I was thinking, literally.  Clearly, I have been enjoying this blog in terms of organizing my thoughts, so it makes sense to stick with it.  Today’s post is merely an attempt to reassure myself that I’m not abandoning my journal. 🙂

As to specifically what’s going on, I must admit these are anxious, stressful times.  I’m not blaming anyone, just explaining — I have a senior in high school who has so much on his plate that Karen and I can’t help but worry about him getting it all done.  Don’t get me wrong, he is a great guy, and I really do believe in him.  The hard part is essentially “reliving”, through him, the trials and tribulations of high school.  Each day the stress builds unless something gets checked off his list — for example, a week and a half ago he finished submitting 7 college applications, and that led to several days of cheery optimism.  Then a progress report on his 2nd quarter grades came through, and that has caused serious anxiety.  Not that his grades are bad overall, but a couple of them need serious work.

Wow, like I said, I do not want to pick on my son or anyone else.  This is all part of stress management.  My volunteer work makes me happy, and my yoga classes, cycling, and even a bit of running keep me feeling healthy, which is truly the key to everything else.  Things are going well, and I can’t complain.  We all have burdens to bear.  As a parent, what else would one expect except that the kids are sometimes a source of worry?  More importantly, however, they are a source of love, laughter, and youthful energy and spirit!



About goldenbearflyer

Robert Martz is a writer who doesn't make any money writing, so he keeps a day job in finance. He lives and works in Walnut Creek, CA. He began blogging in 2011 as a way of taking responsibility for and finding a place to put his thoughts and feelings. He loves to eat, cook, and travel. He volunteers, practices yoga, runs, bicycles, hikes, and explores nature with passion and a child-like sense of wonder. He is inspired by his amazing friends, doers and other writers. Check out another of his blogs at http://goldenbearflyer.webnode.com/.
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